And three prom proposals later and it still doesn’t get any less awkward. 

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Sorry for not wanting to go to an expensive dance that I’ve been saying I’m not going to since September. Sorry for clarifying that I’m not in the correct place to be in a relationship. Sorry that you don’t understand that I’m not conventionally romantic. Sorry that I’m not sentimental. Sorry that I told you to stop spending money. Sorry that you need to save money, but spend it anyway. Sorry you wasted your time. Sorry you have shitty taste in girls. Sorry that you understand literally nothing about who and what I am. Sorry that I don’t have as much free time as you. Sorry that we appreciate different things. Sorry that you felt like you needed to consult her. Sorry that you feel like you need something from me. Sorry that it all made me feel like a prostitute. Sorry I don’t take anything seriously. Sorry that you’re so nice. 

Two…TWO kids in my computer science class have just lost their moms to cancer. Within the past two weeks. All I can think is how I wish I could take that pain from them because I would not give a fuck if my mom died.